Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me? [Part 2]

In This Episode…

• The four different levels/categories of friendship, and how to distinguish between them • How to let go of a friendship you have outgrown • How to cultivate existing friendships that you want to maintain • The best way to reach out to someone new (or an acquaintance) to pursue or deepen a friendship

(Note: Part 1 and Part 2 cover the same content with two different guests. Some information is repeated for the show notes of both, with unique guest information and podcast links.)

Ways to Listen to this Episode:

  1. Use the player to listen/download the episode from this page (see Links and Resources below)

  2. Listen on iTunes or Stitcher (don't forget to rate, review and subscribe!)

Key Points

Don’t feel guilty about letting an old friend go. You can still love someone even if you no longer like them.

If you find yourself forcing interactions or feeling obligated to be around someone you really don’t vibe with anymore, continuing to do so will suck the joy out of what friendship is all about. Respect that you in a different place in your life than this person [than you used to be]. Feeling obligated now can lead to feelings of resentment with this person later. Be honest about where you are.

People want to connect. But understand that saying, “We should get together soon” is NOT a plan to get together, but just an expression of a desire to hang out.

Action is key: if you don’t do it, it won’t happen.

What You Can Do

Listen to your friend who says that they miss you, and evaluate what their friendship meant to you before, and where the two of you are now.

Holidays, birthdays and special occasions are a great time to reach out to people you haven’t talked to in a while. Drop a note or make a call to catch up—or to set a date to catch up in person. Even a simple picture message via text can let a person know you are thinking of them.

Greeting cards are another great way to stay in touch and remember someone on their special day, or acknowledge a special event (graduation, etc.).

To get to know someone better, you could explore what it is that brought you two together (an event, common interests etc.). Express your genuine interest in getting to know them better.

When networking, don’t attend just thinking about what you will get out of it. Expect to connect and form alliances that can become great partnerships (either business or personal). Show up authentically and interested in those you meet.

Connect with My Guest

Angela Betancourt, Founder of AB Public Relations and Author of Networking in Miami

Website

Twitter

Links and Resources

7 Ways to Make New Friends as an Adult Because It’s Not as Easy as it Sounds by Teresa Newsome

Do You Filter Your Relationships? You Probably Should by Donald Miller

Frenemies No More: How to Deal with Friends Who Have Hurt You by Daree Allen

How To Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie (Note: This is an affiliate link, which helps offset costs incurred to produce this show. Thank you for supporting the Kickin’ It with Daree podcast!)

We Have to Allow Our Friendships to Evolve by Natalie Lue